Quotes About Funny

Brought up to respect the conventions, love had to end in marriage. I'm afraid it did.

I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead.

Parents are the last people on earth who ought to have children.

Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.

A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.

Everything in life is somewhere else, and you get there in a car.

If you can't tell a spoon from a ladle, then you're fat!

If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number?

The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver.

Moderation is a virtue only in those who are thought to have an alternative.