Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.

It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.

If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative.

Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.

The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.

I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.