Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.

The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'

There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.

The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.

A fool and his money are soon elected.

Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other.

If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.

There is no more independence in politics than there is in jail.