A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.

Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good.

It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf.

A bad man is the sort who weeps every time he speaks of a good woman.

Husbands never become good they merely become proficient.

If women believed in their husbands they would be a good deal happier and also a good deal more foolish.

There is a saying in Baltimore that crabs may be prepared in fifty ways and that all of them are good.

Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage.

The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.

The worst government is often the most moral. One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane. But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.