I gave a funny speech at my wife's birthday party, and I'm thinking, 'Hey, I've still got it.'

There's also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny.

I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.

It began to dawn on me that perhaps my country needed me more at home than overseas.

There are times when I'm driving home after a day's shooting, thinking to myself, That scene would've been so much better if I had written it out.

Well, after the divorce, I went home and turned all the lights on!

The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it.

I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at all. I was interested in being a great comedian.

I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money - this is the guy who needs to laugh.

Every relationship is just so tenuous and precarious.