I think my best work is when I'm kind of in charge.

I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.

Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?

I love being famous. It's almost like being white.

Sometimes people offer you plays, they offer you parts, but they only offer it because I'm famous.

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

Funny is only something that others know about you - you can't be funny by yourself.

Hollywood's just not funny.

Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.