Quotes by P. J. O'rourke

I think it's been hard for people to understand how Islam can be a good religion, and yet the Islamists are evil. Those of us who have had experience with Islam understand this, just as we understand the difference between snake handlers and people going to church on Sunday morning.

I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've done as a 'learning experience.' It makes me feel less stupid.

Ideology, politics and journalism, which luxuriate in failure, are impotent in the face of hope and joy.

The idea of capitalism is not just success but also the failure that allows success to happen.

Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.

My wife and I both come from Irish families. There are two kinds of Irish families: the hitting kind and the kidding kind. If you're fortunate - and both of us are - you come from the kidding kind of Irish family.

A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relative. Then you can not only be nothing, you can do nothing too.

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.

Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.